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Tuesday, October 22, 2013

If I Were a TEACHER




IF I WERE A TEACHER
(from the eyes of a 3rd grader)
"If I were a teacher, there would be three hours of recess every day.  We would watch movies on massage chairs after recess and play on iPads.  There would be NO homework EVER, and we would take field trips to see the Chicago Bulls."
-Mr. Yoerger (3rd grade teacher at One Magic Classroom Inc.)

Welcome back my friends to a brand new year of AWESOME from One Magic Classroom.  This is my second time around the blog world spreading happiness with an entirely new group of creative, magical, inspirational, and totally random 3rd-graders.  We took the global blog world by storm last year for the first time ever at East Dubuque Elementary, and we're here to do it again, only ten times bigger and better (like an upgrade to heated seats in a car).

Attention!  We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming with a brief message from the very first class of One Magic Classroom:
Brody loves puppets, and puppets love Brody.
(Photo circa March 2013 from The National One Magic
Classroom Library of Congress Archive)


Last year's group wanted me to tell the new kids (yes, my new 3rd grade class) that they were the first One Magic Classroom blog ever (which I guess makes them really special or something....don't worry, you won't be forgotten).  In fact, without you, our totally new group of magical kids wouldn't have a reading fort and a sock puppet theater.  We also wouldn't have as big of an audience without the cool things you did last year.  So don't worry, we won't forget that you made East Dubuque history!!!




"If I were a teacher, I would have a HUGE candy jar, and the students would get candy every day.  We would even have class pets (five dogs, four bunnies, and sixteen hamsters!).  Robots would do your homework, and we would have a 100-inch flat screen T.V. to watch videos on."
- Ms. DuMuth (head of the Agricultural Research and Development)


"If I were a teacher, my class would have: beanbag chairs, a flat screen T.V., electric pens, a pool, a baseball field and a basketball court, iPods, iPads, a LEGO fort, electric name tags, cool car folders, five cats, and the entire classroom would be made of glass!"
Mr. Huseman (head of the Botany Department: with an emphasis on carnivorous plants)


I decided to start the year off with a writing prompt beginning with: "If I were a teacher..."  A box of vintage glasses and some adhesive beards go a long way in helping to make to this writing prompt a heck of a lot more fun.  It's easy to see from the following students that these future teachers won't be assigning any homework in the near future, nor doing much of anything besides playing with LEGOs and watching television on the largest screens imaginable.


"If I were a teacher, my classroom would have a 1,000-inch T.V. with the most comfortable chairs in the world.  There would never be any homework, and we would go to Hollywood to party for field trips.  All of the lockers would be automatic, and each student would get one million dollars.  At recess we would have paintball wars, and instead of riding the bus to school, we'd take a Ferrari.  
-Mr. Shireman (Professor of Etymology at The Don't-Ask-Questions-Unless-You-Know-What-You're-Talking-About University)

Take a look at some more of our educational staff here at One Magic Classroom INC:

Mr. McDonald (Professor of Ornithology at Unibrow University)
If you can't tell, Mr. McDonald stayed up really late writing his master's thesis on the formation of birds. The best thing about this photo is the heading under his name tag, which states "This is my life".  Brilliant, if you ask me.  So much said, in so few words.  For Tyler, it's just another day for the overworked professor of bird studies.

Ms. Turner (Professor of Latin Studies at The Don't-Give-Me-Attitude College of Liberal Arts and Sciences)


Ms. Lehnhoff (Professional Horse Trainer at The Equine Institute of Higher Education)


Ms. Anger (Editorial Advisor for LEGO Industries)


Here we are!!!  All 24 bright, shining, super stars who just can't wait to share their magic with the rest of the world.  

There you have it.  Our very first blog post for Season II of One Magic Classroom.  Before you leave today, remember three very important facts from today's lesson:
1.  Kids are great because they are totally spontaneous and creative (when you let them).
2.  Ornithology is the study of birds.
3.  You can't go wrong with LEGOs and candy when you're talking with eight year-olds.

"Truly wonderful the mind of a child is."
YODA, Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones